The Bad Boy’s Guide To Asking Women Out, And Actually Getting A Yes, Instead Of A Slap

Many guys are wondering as to how useful or effective pickup lines actually are when they wish to approach the opposite sex.

But what usually comes to mind when we hear the words “pickup line”? 

Is it somewhere along the lines of a sleazy looking guy lurking in nightclubs, on the lookout for his latest conquest, wearing a gold chain resting on a hairy chest? 

He walks up to a woman…his eyes going up and down, drinking in her image, akin to a predator eyeing his prey hungrily…opening his mouth to blurt out a lame pickup line that makes the woman roll her eyes in an obvious effort to not pour her Cosmopolitan all over his head. 

pickup lineThe pickup line of course maybe one (or two) of these classics (and classic failures, for some)…

 “Baby, you’d better be trained to give CPR, ‘cause you just took my breath away.”

 “Excuse me, can you spare a quarter? [The woman asks: a quarter for what?] I’m going to call my mother; she needs to know I finally met the woman I’ve been dreaming of.” 

“Do you happen to have a map with you? I think I just got lost in your eyes.” 

“You are religious, right? [What?] Because you are definitely the answer to my prayers.” 

“I’m sorry miss, you need to buy me a drink. [why?] Because I dropped my drink when I laid eyes on you.” 

“Excuse me, I just arrived in town – can you give me the directions to your house/apartment?” 

“I play this field, and with you I just had a home run.” 

“Would you keep me if I followed you home? I don’t eat much.” 

“You’re definitely the prime rib in this meat market.” 

“I think your parents are aliens, there’s nothing on Earth that comes closest to what you are.”

Here’s the deal; you CAN use funny pick up lines when you want to approach women and these pickup lines are never lame. They can even make you look adorable and we all know what a plus that is.

Here are a handful of examples of some of the most successful pickup lines I have used when approaching women. The secret is to make sure you follow the pickup line with something clever. (These “transitions” would be discussed shortly). 

“Do you agree that we’d look cute on a wedding cake, you and I?” 

or…

“There was a little kid with wings that shot me with a heart-shaped arrow in the back and I need your help pulling it out.”

or… 

“So how does it feel to be the most beautiful woman in the room?”

or… 

“A thousand painters working for a thousand years would not be enough to create art as beautiful as you are.”

 (Keep in mind that these pickup lines won’t work with girls that are very beautiful and KNOW they are beautiful. Use these lines only when you approach women that are a little shy and definitely not the stuck-up type.) 

And there are other pickup lines used by guys. For the sake of bluntness, we’d call these the.. 

Pick Up Lines That Would Get You a Painful Kick In The Balls

Again, you should use this type of pickup lines carefully – very carefully. Because although they may work particularly if the woman you plan approaching is very drunk or is a nymphomaniac, there is a good chance that you would get slapped or beaten up by her boxer boyfriend who happened to hear your witticism.

So again, use them with extreme caution…

 “So, what has 142 teeth and is now holding back Incredible Hulk? [What?] My pants zipper.” 

“That outfit looks fantastic…especially when it is crumpled and in a heap on my bedroom floor.” 

“There’s an obvious keg in those pants and I’m definitely tapping that ass.” 

Pick Up Lines: The Truth Behind Them

So, pick up lines; are they just really meant to be funny? Do guys actually use them to start conversations or catch the attention of women? I have written many books – quite popular books, I may add on how to approach women and have even taught thousands of men tips on how they can “break the ice” and attract them with witty, effective conversations. 

Personally, if you are only learning how to approach women, the use of pick up lines is definitely NOT advisable. 

What I teach guys is something that I’d like to call “going under the radar”. This means that you would ask or say something witty when you approach girls, usually a question or a comment that would do more than just surprise her but something that would engage her in a conversation with you without her feeling you are sexually interested in her. Basically, you are learning to approach her in a non-threatening way that feels fun and comfortable for her. 

For instance, when you try approaching a woman you might want to ask for her opinion on a topic that she won’t expect; a topic that women actually feel strongly about. 

Opener 1:  My friend Jennifer is totally freaking about something right now and I want to ask you – if you were in her shoes would you let your boyfriend attend a bachelor party if you knew there would be strippers there, too?

Opener 2: Can you help me settle a debate I’m having with my friends? My friend Jennifer has been going out with this guy for a month and well, she thinks that they are exclusively dating but the thing is he hasn’t changed his Facebook status from single to in a relationship yet and she’s thinking that maybe she should say something… So, how long do you think you need to be dating someone before you change your “single” status to “in a relationship” on Facebook?

The above openers are effective because they are based on “grey areas” in a relationship. This is because men and women have different ideas about how relationships go and what is and what isn’t acceptable. You can also try asking: “Is it considered cheating if a guy is seen hanging out with his ex-girlfriend socially without letting his current girlfriend know? 

When approaching women, you need to get a positive response from her; you have to make her want to get involved in a conversation with you.

So if you are confident and playful, you may want to use these lines to get a fun response: 

“Be honest, do I look gay? ‘Cause there’s this guy in the bathroom that is totally hitting on me.. I don’t know if it’s my shirt or if it is the way my ass looks in these new jeans..”

These are funny and completely makes a woman comfortable talking to you and they are not really “pick up lines”. However, this is not saying that you should not use corny pickup lines when approaching women because SOMETIMES they work, too.

I’ve used some of these corny pick up lines myself and they worked to start conversations and got me more successful results (Read: I either got her phone number;  got another date with her or slept with her that same night).

Showing I have a sense of humor also worked. I “confessed” to her that I used a pickup line, a CORNY pickup line to catch her attention, following it up with: “I know that completely sounded like a corny pickup line but I couldn’t think of anything else to do to get you to talk to me. My name is David, by the way.”

Onward, I used what I call the Samurai Technique, asking her a few strategic questions so she would relax and get comfortable and start talking about herself. There are also a few techniques that allowed me to start a conversation and keep it flowing all the while fueling her attraction and curiosity.

Every now and then even the corniest of pickup lines can be used as a fun way to break the ice with women we want to approach. The secret to making them work is learning to follow it up with something witty, original or funny that makes her comfortable and want to engage in a conversation with you.

On a parting note, there’s this line that has worked for me a lot…

“You’re so attractive that I forgot my pick up line.”

Try beating that line if you can!